Listen to Old People

There was a fascinating article in the Vancouver Sun today, written by Susan Schwartz, about why we should listen to old people. It reminded me of the many times my mother and I would talk about life, love, her youth and the mistakes she made, and where I'd be in life when I got older. I'd hang on every word because I could "see" her as a 17-year-old being told by her father that since she was finished high school, she had to get a job. Now you must understand that my mother had been raised in a family where money was not an issue and getting a job was a foreign notion to her. But she did get on with the provincial telephone company and that was how she eventually met my father.

In the article by Susan Schwartz, she writes that "some lament never having asked their elders, while they had the chance, about lessons life had taught them." I will forever treasure those moments with my mother, especially the moments when, stricken with Alzheimers Disease, she'd go way back into her memory bank and bring forth some words of wisdom. Once, my mother told me that I was impatient and she quoted this saying: "Patience is a virtue possessed by few women and no men." She also told me that I tend to be an intolerant person and that I must learn to accept people and situations as they are. Finally, she told me not to analyze everything so much, but to just enjoy life.

The physical and emotional scars of my life encourage me to take advantage of every opportunity that comes my way. Playwright Edward Albee said that wisdom is a matter of perspective. "Maybe it's finally being able to figure out what you should be worrying about and what you shouldn't be worrying about."

My mother admitted to me that she had failed in some aspects of her life and now that I'm, shall we say "mature," I can now admit to having failed in some aspects of my life, too. But that said, I've never forgotten those three things my mother said to me. I try very hard to be patient, tolerant, and to fully enjoy my life and what it brings to me.

And today, after weeks of miserable weather, I took my first solo walk without my brace in the sunshine - and saw some daffodils.