About Me

My photo
Delta, British Columbia, Canada
I took very early retirement from teaching in '06 and did some traveling in Europe and the UK before settling down to do some private tutoring. As a voracious reader, I have many books waiting in line for me to read. Tell me I shouldn't read something, and I will. I'm a happy, optimistic person and I love to travel and through that believe that life can be a continuous learning experience. I'm looking forward to traveling more some day. I enjoy walking, cycling, water aerobics & and sports like tennis, volleyball, and fastpitch/baseball. I'm just getting into photography as a hobby and I'm enjoying learning all the bits and bobs of my digital camera. My family is everything to me and I'm delighted to be the mother of two girls and the Gramma of a boy and a girl. I may be a Gramma, but I'm at heart just a girl who wants to have fun.

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

On My Own

Good morning, everyone, and welcome to the week of O here at ABC Wednesday. Today, I'd like to tell you a bit about what it's like to be on my own again. 

At first, it was very hard with feelings of sorrow, guilt, loneliness, emptiness and regret.  Although I knew it was the right thing to do, it took a long time to get over those feelings plus the obscene rage I felt at being so outrageously betrayed.  The marriage, if you can call it that, lasted less than a year, and in fact, was over within a few days of the wedding.  Even after all those years of being together, it was a shock to discover that it had all been a lie.

So I moved on.

Last summer I had a carport sale and got rid of stuff I didn't need anymore.  But then I wrecked my ankle again!  So I spent many a day sitting outside in the shade reading lots and lots of books and chatting with neighbours as they'd go by and check on how I was doing.  At times, I felt a bit lonely as I couldn't just up and do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted.  But I healed up quite well and in my mind started making my decisions on what to do next.

First, I decided it was high time I had a holiday.  So I made my arrangements to travel to England and Wales in June and July of this year to visit some friends.  Then, it was time to sell my house and move to a condo where there were no memories of anyone there. 

This is what greeted me at the library one day - a beautiful symbol of the cycle of growth and the return of warmth and abundance after the long winter.  Talk about a metaphor for my life!
Now I am firmly ensconced in my new home with my beloved Tegan, 3-year-old English yellow Labrador.  It's because of her that I have to get up in the morning and get dressed, take her out, get her breakfast and tidy up.  I know in my heart that if it weren't for her, I would probably sleep until noon before going out to the library to meet my students.  Then I would veg in front of the TV until bedtime.  But with all her balls, she kisses me awake and off we go!
 Here, she's asking if it's supper time yet.
Since there is a lovely and huge garden almost outside my door, Tegan and I spend a lot of time there.  We've met so many wonderful residents, some with dogs and some without.  The gardens are beautiful and I've taken many photos as the spring blossoms have appeared.  I throw a ball for Tegan and when we tire out, we sit in the shade - I sit in one of the nice lawn chairs that are provided for those who use the area.  Sometimes Tegan and I go to a neighbourhood park where we play Frisbee.  Although there is enough room in the garden here, Tegan gets too excited with the Frisbee and can start barking...I don't want anyone complaining about that.  I've actually had compliments on the fact that she doesn't bark at everyone who goes by the gate - like the smaller yappy dogs here.  Here she is playing with her new boyfriend, part Bernese/part Labrador TITAN - handsome devil, isn't he?
So, I'm nicely settled in a new home, I'm anxiously anticipating my trip in 2 months, my older daughter and her family are now living in the area and my younger daughter and her husband are moving back here, too.  We will all be together - but separate - the best of all worlds for us. Finally, here's a shot of the cherry blossoms in full bloom where we play. The grass is now green with pink dots as the blooms are shedding and the trees are filling in with leaves.
I felt so overwhelmed for such a long time, but now I've come full circle and know that I'm a winner, a survivor, and an optimist.  And, as Helen Reddy sang, "I am woman, hear me roar!"  With optimum thanks to the gang at ABC Wednesday - the obliging Denise Nesbitt, creator of ABCW, the organized Roger, our administrator, and the outstanding group of bloggers who visit everyone who contributes here.  And thanks to YOU ALL for all your support as I've travelled this objectionable path.


Roger Owen Green said...

I'm very happy for you, Leslie. Stay strong!


Melody Steenkamp said...

HI Leslie, first of all, a very sincere big hug for you, you go girl!

Although i (thank God) have not been betrayed by my husband, we are already married for 32,4 years) ... i do know all to well how it feels to get betrayed by people who you love so much.

How strong you are to have come over it, wow !! I wish i would have know sooner though so i could have been trying to support you more!

This post, so personal, of yours, touches my heart and i sent you all my best wishes. And for you i wish even more luck, someone who is worthy of you and your love!

Trubes said...

What a touching post Leslie you have had one heck of a year.
I can't believe he treated you so badly after all that you had done for him never mind you've got your family nearby and your lovely Tegan to look after you, she's adorable,
stay strong and take care,
Love Di xxx
ABCW team xx

ellen b. said...

Happy to read about your journey to where you are now and that you are optimistic again. That's a good thing. I'm looking forward with you on your trip to England. Do you have room in your suitcase? Have a great week Leslie!

carol l mckenna said...

Wonderful post and beautiful photos ~ You are living so well and your doggie is a great motivator ( I know mine is) ~ Traveling is always fun ~ so moving down the road and living well ~ thanks for sharing your 'long hard climb'...Helen Reddy ~ so I hear you Roar! xox

Happy Week to you ~ ^_^

Arnoldo L. Romero, MLA said...

I admire your strength and optimism, which have helped you overcome this obstacle in your life. You are blessed to have your daughters coming to live close to you, and have the daily company of sweet and beautiful Tegan. Happy ABC Wednesday, my friend!

Photo Cache said...

Tegan is so cute. A blessing that you have her/him in this time of your life.


Norma Ruttan said...

Bravo, Leslie! Here's to your strength in surviving such awfulness. Lots of beauty to feed your soul outside your home. Pets do help us through hard times by their needs. Mine certainly did during the weeks and months after my husband's death.

Priya said...

Way to go Leslie! Its great you have adorable Tegan for company :) Lovely pics there..
Thanks for sharing your story.

Murthy K v v s said...

All your posts teach us a great deal of words.Thanks for sharing.

Reader Wil said...

Hi Leslie! You are such a strong woman. I admire you and I am glad that Tegan is such great company. You are doing fine, but I know that loneliness will be a normal feeling from time to time.One of our queens wrote a book, the title of which is "Lonely, but not Alone".
I sincerely hope that you will continue being happy with the life you have now.
Wil, ABCW Team

Ira said...

The new place seems to have made a positive change and that is always welcoming. A lovely insight into your world. may you always stay happy and blessed!

Ann said...

I'm happy for you on your monumental change.

Su-sieee! Mac said...

Your life with Tegan sounds wonderful!

Beloo Mehra said...

Looks like you are settling in nicely in the new home. And always best to let go of the disappointments, no matter how hard. Stay strong and happy!

Suzy said...

Glad you are moving on. Stay strong and be happy.

Carin said...

I am alone today too. But with my dogs, I feel loved. Have a good week.