About Me

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Delta, British Columbia, Canada
I took very early retirement from teaching in '06 and did some traveling in Europe and the UK before settling down to do some private tutoring. As a voracious reader, I have many books waiting in line for me to read. Tell me I shouldn't read something, and I will. I'm a happy, optimistic person and I love to travel and through that believe that life can be a continuous learning experience. I'm looking forward to traveling more some day. I enjoy walking, cycling, water aerobics & and sports like tennis, volleyball, and fastpitch/baseball. I'm just getting into photography as a hobby and I'm enjoying learning all the bits and bobs of my digital camera. My family is everything to me and I'm delighted to be the mother of two girls and the Gramma of a boy and a girl. I may be a Gramma, but I'm at heart just a girl who wants to have fun.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Please Don't Pick My Mommy!


Dear Mr. Roe,

Please don't pick my Mommy to go on a trip with you! I would miss her SO much 'cuz she's such a great cuddler. Sometimes she lets me sleep with her. She gives me lots of love and kisses and pets and when I give her a "high five" she gives me cookies. I understand you're a "Cookie Monster" so you know how much I'd miss my cookies! But, if you find her irresistible (like I do), I guess I'll just have to make do without her for a while. Just make sure you bring her back safe and sound.

Sincerely,

Robbie

Sunday, August 21, 2005

You know you're a teacher when...

* you grade papers in the car, during commercials, in faculty meetings, in the bathroom, and have even been seen grading in church.

* you cheer when you hear April 1 does not fall on a school day.

* you can't walk past a crowd of kids without straightening up the line.

* you can gulp down a full lunch in 2 minutes, 18 seconds.

* you know the best end of semester lesson plans can come from Blockbuster.

* you know the shortest distance and length of travel time from the classroom to the office.

* you have never heard an original excuse.

* you know the best places to find used gum.

* you feel the urge to snap your fingers in public at children you do not know to correct their behaviour.

* you want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work 8 to 3:20 and have summers free."

* you hear the heartbeats of crisis; you always have time to listen; you know you teach students, not subjects; and you know you are absolutely non-expendable.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

It's Great to be a Woman

We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
Taxis stop for us.
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival the Speedo.
We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
We can congratulate our team mate without ever touching her rear end.
We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
We have the ability to dress ourselves.
We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
We will never regret piercing our ears.
There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Manhattan Beach Meet and Greet

Hi everyone! I'd love some input about the LA (and Chicago) meet & greets. Who is thinking about going and who is definitely going? Do you think we go to BOTH nights or just one? What are you planning to wear? What else could we do while in the area (e.g. during the day/s)? Feel free to put in comments, questions, suggestions, etc. Thanks.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

BRAS

A man walked into the Women's Department of Macy's in New York City.
He told the Sales lady, "I would like a Baptist bra for my wife, size
36B".

With a quizzical look, the saleslady asked, "What kind of bra?"

He repeated, "A Baptist bra. She said to tell you that she wanted a
Baptist bra and that you would know what she wanted."

"Ah, now I remember," Said the saleslady, "we don't get as many
requests for them as we used to. Mostly our customers lately want the
Catholic bra or the Salvation Army bra, or the Presbyterian type".

Confused and a little flustered, the man asked, "So what are the
differences?"

The lady responded, "Well, it's really quite simple.

The Catholic type supports the masses,

The Salvation Army lifts up the fallen,

The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright."

He mused at that for a moment and then asked, "So, what is the
Baptist type for?"

"They", she replied, "make mountains out of molehills".

And, if you need more information here's some more:

Have you ever wandered why bras are lettered A, B, C, D, DD, E, F,
G, H and how the letters are actually used to define bra sizes? Well,
if you have ever wondered, but couldn't figure it out, here's the code:

A. Almost Boobs

B. Barely Boobs

C. Can't Complain

D. Dang!

DD. Double Dang!

E. Enormous

F. Fake

G. Get a reduction

H. Help Me, I've fallen and can't get up.....

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

SOMETHING FISHY

A woman is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husband's best friend.
They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they're just lying there, the phone rings.
The woman picks up the receiver.
Her lover looks over at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation...
She is speaking in a cheery voice:
"Hello? Oh, hi. I'm so glad that you called. Really? That's wonderful.
I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye bye."
She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?"
"Oh" she replies,
"That was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he's
having on his fishing trip with you."

BEACHES



The first picture is the Pier at White Rock, which is on the east side of Boundary Bay. Doesn't the pier remind you of the picture we've seen on SB's blog (Manhattan Beach)? The second picture is my grandson Noah playing on "my" beach on the west side of the bay. Vancouver and environs have some of the most beautiful beaches ever.

JELLYFISH

If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma!
This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a
bad day at work...think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an
E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2
on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job
experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a
bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work,
so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's
not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first
must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool.
So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial
water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the
sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to
the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now
this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with
no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose
and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with
warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within
a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my
back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.
The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my
suit.

Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I
scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of
my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to
the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing
hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to
make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five
minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass
helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it
on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out,
but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY :)!!!!!

Monday, August 08, 2005

Crackpot Friends

Two Pots

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the end of a pole which she carried across her neck. One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.

At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full. For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the
woman one day by the stream.

"I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house." The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?

That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower
seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them.

"For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.

You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. To all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers.

Why Women Are Crabby

Why Women are Crabby

We started to "bud" in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find that anything that came in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurt so bad it brought us to tears. So came the ridiculously uncomfortable training bra contraption that the boys in school would snap until we had calluses on our backs.

Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we bloated, we cramped, we got the hormone crankies, had to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.

Our next little rite of passage (premarital or not) was having sex for the first time which was about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils (IF he did it right and didn't end up with his little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about.

Then it' was off to Motherhood where we learned to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we didn't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learned to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we were preparing to have Rosemary's Baby.

Our once flat bellies looked like we swallowed a watermelon whole and we pee'd our pants every time we sneezed. When the big moment arrived, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we had to waddle, with our big cartoon feet, moaning in pain all the way to the ER.

Then it was huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hearmeroar. Calm down and push Just one more good push (more like 10)," warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the ***** (and hubby) square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10lb bowling ball through a keyhole.

After that, it was time to raise those angels only to find that when all that "cute" wears off, the beautiful little darlings morphed into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines.

Then come their teen years. Need I say more?

When the kids are almost grown, we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our early 40's - while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday.

So we progress into the grand finale! : "The Menopause," the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned "buds" or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off anything that moves.

Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men when men get off so easy INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks...

So, while I love being a woman, "Womanhood" would make the Great Gandhi a tad crabby. Women are the "weaker sex"? Yeah right. Bite me.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Sawyer Glacier


As we travelled up Tracy Arm in Alaska, we passed many, many icebergs of incredible shapes and sizes. The water was a beautiful turquoise and the icebergs reflected this in their lower halves. When we finally reached Sawyer Glacier, the ship's captain announced that we were as close as we could go; if we went any closer, it would be too dangerous. So, next time I go I want to take the special excursion where you can take a smaller boat right through the ice floes close to the foot of the glacier. At any rate, the whole experience was phenomenal and unforgettable.

Monday, August 01, 2005

Inukshuk


This picture is of an inukshuk on the BC side of the Alaska/BC border. The inukshuk is an Inuit symbol depicting direction and distance. Several cities were engraved on it and I was very surprised to see my own hometown there. That’s why I’m pointing. A stylized version of the inukshuk is the official logo of the 2010 Winter Olympics to be held in Vancouver.

ALASKA


With all the talk from RR today of the possibility of a cruise to Alaska, I thought I'd share some photos taken last summer. It was my first cruise ever and I swore I'd do it again. Absolutely LOVED it! The photos may not be that clear but I was using an old Ricoh TF-900 (on telephoto a lot). Enjoy and may it encourage others to sign up to go. This picture is at White Pass Summit - border between Alaska/British Columbia. We had travelled up the mountainside via replica coaches pulled by vintage diesel locomotives. We passed the Gold Rush cemetery, several waterfalls, went through Tunnel Mtn, over a steel bridge (scary!) and past Dead Horse Gulch.

Sunflowers


When I was watching Pop & Me again last night and saw RR standing in a field of sunflowers, I suddenly remembered that I had taken a photo of a sunflower field when I was travelling in France in '97. Did you know that they are so called because they turn to the sun all day long - they face the sunrise in the East in the morning and gradually move until they face sunset in the West in the evening? They are Daughter #2's favourite flower, so took a few photos, got them enlarged and framed for her. She was thrilled and to this day has them on her bedroom wall. My camera is an old Ricoh TF-900 that still takes good photos, but I'd love to get a digital like Cheryl's. (You take such beautiful photos, C.) I love the beauty of nature and would be taking shots of everything - from flowers in my garden to the wonders of the world I hope to see some day. Since I'm not artistically inclined in painting or crafts, perhaps I could express myself in photography. And, since I love to write, wouldn't it be great to publish a book of photography with accompanying text! Dreams - aah.....