About Me

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Delta, British Columbia, Canada
I took very early retirement from teaching in '06 and did some traveling in Europe and the UK before settling down to do some private tutoring. As a voracious reader, I have many books waiting in line for me to read. Tell me I shouldn't read something, and I will. I'm a happy, optimistic person and I love to travel and through that believe that life can be a continuous learning experience. I'm looking forward to traveling more some day. I enjoy walking, cycling, water aerobics & and sports like tennis, volleyball, and fastpitch/baseball. I'm just getting into photography as a hobby and I'm enjoying learning all the bits and bobs of my digital camera. My family is everything to me and I'm delighted to be the mother of two girls and the Gramma of a boy and a girl. I may be a Gramma, but I'm at heart just a girl who wants to have fun.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

YOUNG WIDOWS

This is what I posted on clickgirl (Brenda's) site about my dream of writing an inspirational book about women who became widows far too young.

Brenda and Jackie! This is absolutely amazing! You can definitely count me in on whatever comes from this. I have always wanted to travel, but like Chandra, couldn't find friends who had the either the time and/or the money to join me. Also, I've always been afraid that if I gave up the security of my teaching position to do what I really wanted, I'd end up homeless.

This whole adventure has been so eye opening to me. I realize now that life is too short to not try to realize our dreams. Besides travel, my dream has been to write. From meeting so many wonderful women through Richard's search, I am now working on making my dream come true.

I am going to spend the next few months working on the financial aspects of ending my teaching career and beginning a new one writing. I have been thinking of all the women I met who became widows very young in life (between the ages of 40ish and 60ish) and I would like to write an inspirational book of surviving one of the worst tragedies a woman can imagine. Losing your husband at an age where you are too young to be relegated to the back pew of the church but too old to easily meet suitable or available men is more than difficult. No, we do not NEED a man, but most of us really do want to have someone to love and someone to love us. It is just simply in our nature.

We are all survivors. Most of us have had to raise our children alone. Most of us have had to work full time while doing so. Some of us have had support (financial and/or emotional) and some of us not.

All these years, I thought I was one of a very few young widows and in a category of my own. Now I realize that is not true. If I can help one young widow through my dream of writing about "our" survival, it will all have been worth it.

I've never done this before, but am willing to learn all aspects of writing and publishing in order to realize this dream. Maybe you, Brenda, have some ideas of how to go about this (since you're in the media environment). Maybe we could eventually do a documentary. Something. Anything. We need to get this story out.

Regarding divorcees. I know that they have gone through or do go through a lot of the same grieving processes that widows do. But I have no experience of that. Let me try to do this one project and if it's successful, maybe I could do something similar for you.

I would be interested in hearing from anyone who has lost her husband from accident, illness, violence, or suicide (like I did), was in the age range I mentioned above, and would like to take part in this venture. I would use pseudonyms so as to make it easier to tell your story fully. Please contact me through my blog. Thanks to all.


10/22/2005 11:05 PM

13 comments:

Love 2 Travel said...

Leslie
One thing I have to say for this blog, is that it has been a wonderful thing to bring like minded women together. I hope we do get to meet. Are you going on the Cruise?

leslie said...

Hi Carol I'm not sure about the Alaska cruise as I've just done it summer 04. But, if the deal is great, I might just go for the fun of meeting more great women. I would really love to do a Hawaiian Islands cruise, a Caribbean and Mediterranean cruise as well as go back to Europe and see more of it. I, like you, am interested in the architecture and the history. I've been to France once and England twice, Scotland once. Haven't really had the opportunity thus far but am going to make it a priority (travel, that is). Great to hear from you.

Belizegial said...

Hey Leslie

Gracious, it's been quite awhile since we blogged together :)

I have been busy with work and my daily life. The SB venture has come to a bit of conclusion for all of us ole timers, but our personal quest continues.

Take care of you Leslie. Life is about going down roads that end in unexpected places. Who knows next where our paths will lead us. You are a dignified person with a great personality, something I liked about you from day one.

The book idea is a good one and I hope more women come to you with their personal stories. Have you thought about having metalxmonkey set up a website for this purpose? The internet super highway is a great place to get your message across.

Best wishes for the future and hope we can continue to connect in this pathway of life. God Bless.

DesertFlowers said...

Hey Leslie I love that you put Joe in his place on RR's blog. They are so damn pompous makes me sick. Anyway, I have no use for Richards planned alaskian cruise. Let the other followers be taken in by him. I want to do as we originally planned and that is do our own cruise. Afterall it was our idea and he like many other things stole our games and ideas to make him look like he was doing something for us. I really like the send us your bio and picture and we'll put it on Perfect Match and you get to pay for it. Ok, duh, I'm a dummy and will just do that. LOL

Hugs Suzanne

Love 2 Travel said...

Hi Leslie
I will keep you in mind the next time I am looking for a travel partner. I am going on another Mediterranean cruise with my sister in the Spring. She also loves Museums and fine arts, architecture and history. I would love to do a Hawaii cruise. I hope to retire in Hawaii or San Diego in a couple of years. I want to do a land tour of Europe, I was thinking France, Italy, Netherlands, Austria and Switzerland. China and Machu Pichu are also near the top of my list. I get fantastic deals through my job, and I can take someone else too.

Hey what happened to Vanessa? I thought I saw a picture of her. I didn't see Sherri either. What's going on?

CathyinCarolina said...

Leslie,

Vanessa went home, I missed the details and am anxious to hear myself, but i guess she was insulted in some fashion. So damn tragic, some of the happenings, makes it very hard to keep an open mind that there will be good come out of this!!!

Pennys from Heaven said...

I am wishing you all the best on starting a writing career!! Sounds exciting, and for a good cause also!! You will do great :)

CallmeLin said...

Leslie,

I'm looking forward to the 'book' it really will serve a great need to those going through the loss of a husband. I can remember just holding my own hand for the first year thinking that if I didn't I might just desolve into thin air. Let me know when you want to talk, I so support what you are doing.

CallmeLin said...

Leslie, I forgot to mention that there is a book called 'On Your Own' by Alexandra Armstrong and Mary R. Donahue (the second edition) that was very helpful to me. It is a widow's passage to emotional and financial well-being and covers a lot of information to enable one with the emotional issues of widowhood. Good Luck on your research.

leslie said...

Thanks so much Lin I'm working on details to see if I can "retire" in June. I'd love to travel to visit all of "you" young widows to interview you, hear your stories. I just feel a "call" to do this. It's been on my mind and heart for so long and I just feel it so necessary to do it soon.

First up, though, is the upcoming cruise. Who's up for that?

happy said...

Leslie I commend you on your LifePlans. Have forwarded your blog address to a friend I think would be interested. Would love to be able to say yes to the HA Islands cruise, but can't predict that far ahead right now. Likely I'd get to the great NW USofA - esp. OR & WA - & BC before I'd get to a cruise. I want to see gardens at Victoria and perhaps Vancouver next year. (Then I'd HAVE to see Hawaii and Florida to 'complete' seeing all the 50 states. :)

Bon chance with your projects!

HeiressChild said...

hi leslie, don't forget to keep me in mind when you do your "widows" interviews. i'll be happy to share my experiences.

sylvia

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