About Me

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Delta, British Columbia, Canada
I took very early retirement from teaching in '06 and did some traveling in Europe and the UK before settling down to do some private tutoring. As a voracious reader, I have many books waiting in line for me to read. Tell me I shouldn't read something, and I will. I'm a happy, optimistic person and I love to travel and through that believe that life can be a continuous learning experience. I'm looking forward to traveling more some day. I enjoy walking, cycling, water aerobics & and sports like tennis, volleyball, and fastpitch/baseball. I'm just getting into photography as a hobby and I'm enjoying learning all the bits and bobs of my digital camera. My family is everything to me and I'm delighted to be the mother of two girls and the Gramma of a boy and a girl. I may be a Gramma, but I'm at heart just a girl who wants to have fun.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Some Sunday Humour

A pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost. After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, "Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us."
Silence fell on the congregation.

In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers."

The entire congregation said, "Amen!"
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The Veterinarian
One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week!

The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome bycuriosity, approached her.

"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated.

"Why yes,' she replied, "every week my son sends me money and I give some of it to the church."

The pastor replied, "That's wonderful. But $1000 is a lot; are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?"

The elderly woman answered, "$10,000 a week."

The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?"

"He is a veterinarian," she answered.

"That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money," the pastor said. "Where does he practice?"
The woman answered proudly, "In Nevada. He has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas, and one in Reno."

10 comments:

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

Love the first one!

Josie said...

Leslie, LOL. Those are wonderful. :-)

jmb said...

Great fun Leslie

Louis la Vache said...

"Louis" is sending his pastor the link to this. "Louis" will not hold his breath for either of these to appear in the church bulletin, however.....

In the meantime, over at San Francisco Bay Daily Photo, "Louis" shows you how to see the Mona Lisa without traveling to Paris et le Louvre.

Michele (Rocky Mtn.Girl) said...

Oh these are hilarious... made me smile big time!!

starnitesky said...

LOL made me smile a lot!

nancygrayce said...

Too, too cute!

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Heheh! Funny. The first one could even be a sermon by itself.

meggie said...

Loved these jokes!!

MedStudentWife said...

ROFLMAO !!!

Both are good. I must rememeber to send themon... especially the last one.