"I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do. That is character!" -- Theodore Roosevelt
Do you worry what other people think and ignore your own opinion? Do you find yourself trying to work out how other people will feel about a decision rather than considering your own point of view? Of course we all need to be considerate of other people's point of view and be decent and sensitive of such. But if we care too much what other people think, we live by our fears of what others think of us!
To be a truly independent and self-confident person you need to start being more self-directed. What do you think? What do you want? What is your opinion? When you start to care less what others think, you'll start living your life as not a dim reflection of what someone else thinks.
When you care too much what others think, you are open to manipulation because you will tend to go with the herd. When you care less what other people think, you become a more honest and decent person because you don't have to pretend so much.
Read the following quote very carefully:
"If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month." -- Theodore Roosevelt
So if you're worried about what others think of you or your opinions, perhaps it would be a good time to do some internal reflection. First, identify your strengths and weaknesses. Next, learn how you really come across toward other people. Finally, give yourself a reality check and work on some self-improvement.
I started out in life being completely overwhelmed by people in positions of authority. This came as a result of childhood training as I had an extremely controlling father. If I got in trouble at school, I'd get it even worse at home. I wasn't allowed to have an opinion on anything; rather, I was expected to be "seen and not heard." During university years, I learned that if I did NOT have an opinion on something I would quickly sink and fail.
Then I started to become a bit too aggressive and that, too, got me in trouble. It has taken many years of conscious work to learn how to be assertive without being aggressive. Sometimes it's easier to just simply give in to others' ideas and go with the flow, but after their ideas have failed, I admit I've secretly and gleefully relished in their failure. That isn't right, either.
I do try to listen with an open mind to what others think. Sometimes they can sway my opinion. Sometimes they cannot. But as long as I truly believe in what I state as my opinion and state it in an assertive manner, I cannot let others allow me to become less independent and self-confident in my being.
What are your thoughts?